Just a quick post to say: (well that and I promised I’d do a blog about my graduation!)
These last couple of weeks have been a bit of an emotional rollercoaster. I wanted to avoid that cliche, but actually, it’s true.
I’ve gone from one job to another, I’ve re-evaluated what I want in life and dare I say it, graduated.
It might seem dramatic, but when you face a vigorous and downright testing 3 years at university, graduating doesn’t seem real.
I’ll explain: 3 years miles away from home, with imaginary government funded money (because it’s in one day and out the next) and having to get a real job just to get by each month (because I don’t think the government actually understand how much you need to live on…) whilst studying intensely every single day to gain a degree… Well, it sounds pretty made up doesn’t it?
When I finally had my graduation pack through the door… I stared at it in disbelief. I hadn’t actually finished my degree at this point and wasn’t sure I would because… self doubt is a bit of a douche…
Anyway, the pack was all a bit too real for me and I went into a state of sheer panic. What if I couldn’t actually do this? What if I failed? Would these 3 years have been a total waste of time?
BUT I DID DO IT! I did make it. I did finish.
Which I guess serves a lesson to not only me, but you – that even though we may doubt ourselves and believe we aren’t capable, if we push ourselves, believe in ourselves just a little, then we can.
When I finally arrived on the day of my graduation all I felt was an extreme sense of relief. (Also embarrassment because my Mum had the camera and she has this extreme love of close-ups…. *shudders*).
The man holding the service made us all chuckle with “You’ve all made it through 3 years of hell… and now I know what you’re thinking… these last 5 yards with everyone staring at you is going to be the hardest part yet.” He wasn’t wrong. I thought I’d fall over and make a show of myself.
I didn’t, for the record, but I was wholly afraid I would – just like everyone.
Shaking the hands of the man at the end was amazing. It was over – for about 5 minutes until I started my MA – but still, 3 years of gruelling hard work had EVENTUALLY paid off and all I could do was beam into the crowd where my Mum, brother and partner hooted with pride for me.
All the “I can’t do its” and crying late into the night had paid off. I’d crossed the long, arduous finish line and I couldn’t be more proud of myself nor the friends I graduated with.
Well done to us all, and I do hope our paths cross in the future.